One Last Self Portrait

The Male Cactus

Fuzzy Love Cactus

I woke past sunrise and felt much better. I revisited my decision not to hike, but still thought the best choice was to not go. So, I explored the area around my campsite a little and took photos. I walked up the small hill to the west of the campsite and looked out over the expanse of land surrounding me.

The Nine Point Draw campsite is an excellent place to stay. The gentle hills rise to the west and isolate it from the main, paved road. The dirt road leading to it is smooth and easily traveled. Looking east, the desert spreads out in a huge, flat area.

The Santiago Mountains dominate the horizon some 2 to 3 miles away, and there are several interesting features close by: the recent rockslide, Dog Canyon, and Devil's Den. I was completely alone during my stay here, and I've read that the area is one of the least visited in the park.
_______________________________________________________________________________________

When I arrived at the campsite on the previous afternoon, I noticed something very interesting nearby. I walked a little ways from the tenting area, and came across a yucca with something strange growing at its base. The photos on the left say it all :-)

I don't know what type of catus it was, but it was definitely male :-)
_______________________________________________________________________________________

The usual routine ensued after the morning photos: eat, pack up, make coffee, and go. I started to feel sad as I made a right turn onto the main, paved road. I could faintly see the Chisos in the distance and longed to be close to them again.

I had completed most of my trip plans. I didn't get to hike to Devil's Den, but I felt happy about what I did manage to accomplish. I wished that I could have at least hiked to the opening of Devil's Den. I suppose I'll just have to go back someday soon and finish that business :-)

As I drove north towards Marathon, that sad feeling persisted. I felt like I was leaving a good friend or loved family member behind. I wanted to be back in the desert, surrounded by mountains, basking in the dry heat. I wanted to be off exploring and letting my path follow whatever curiosity and interest came to mind. I wanted to watch colorful sunrises and sunsets while listening to the silence of the constant desert.

I forced myself to be happy. I figured that if I felt that longing, sad feeling, then my trip was quite a success. I had experienced things and taken photos that I'll always cherish and keep in my memories for a long time.

Just east of Marathon, on highway 90, the skies darkened and it started to drizzle. I drove on towards Del Rio, enjoying the cooler temperatures under the cloud cover. It looked like a good downpour would start at any moment, but it never did. About 10 miles west of Sanderson, I hit the Big Bend Open Road Race.

The sheriff's dept. had closed down 90 between that point and Sanderson. They were holding normal road traffic while the race was happening. I'm not sure what it was all about or what stage of the race they were in, but their website should explain it all.

I had to wait for over 20 minutes before the road was opened. Slightly annoyed, I pushed on to Del Rio. Car racing is cool and all, but I didn't know our tax dollars paid for such nonsense. Let the rich old farts who can afford those sports cars buy their own track somewhere away from public roadways. That was 20 minutes more I could have spent with my family staying back in Del Rio (I had to hurry back to Houston the next day for work).

If you want your fix of fast driving on public roads, just come to Houston. When the freeways aren't clogged up there doesn't seem to be any speed limit or cops. Just try Beltway 8 during the day. You can burn up all the gas and tires you please with the rest of the lead-foots.

The Reason Behind This Trip

I wanted a trip structured around photography. I'd been on two previous trips with companions that did not place such a high priority on taking photos (they still like photography and its results, but they're not ready to sacrifice all to get "the shot"). While I really enjoyed those trips and had a wonderful time, my photography wants and needs generally don't mesh well with "normal" people's plans.

I wanted to be out in the field with my camera when most folks would rather be sleeping in, eating dinner, or drinking in Terlingua :-) I wanted to make frequent stops, take my time with composing shots, wonder around and often backtrack, and hike the same areas twice- late afternoon and early morning. This becomes somewhat frustrating and boring to companions who just want to hike.

On January 1 of this year, I began organizing and planning a group photo trip for members of the Texas Photo Forum. That trip was planned for early April (see detailed trip pages here), but I missed it because of last-minute changes and events at work. I just couldn't get out of my responsibilities there, unfortunately.

My "important" work schedule was so fluid that I couldn't really make firm plans at all. Finally, I had a 1-week window when things slowed down and I could leave. I cleared my plans with the "boss", my wife, and went on my first solo camping/hiking trip.

Thoughts on Going Solo

In summary, it was fantastic. But I don't mean to say that going without hiking/camping companions sucks and I prefer doing it alone. Sometimes I just need time by myself to be alone and do things as I please. It's my way of relaxing and de-stressing.

I did miss my wife and friend, James (my buddies on my previous trips to Big Bend). My wife and I have also been on countless other camping and hiking trips since our days in college. I missed being able to share my experiences as they happened. The nights were particularly lonely, but by then I was so tired that I crashed soon and hard.

There was an issue about my safety. I was in several remote areas without anyone nearby, and help was far away. I guess in the end, there was an increase in risk regarding safety, but I don't think it was too much of a risk. I addressed these risks in a few different ways (most should be done even if you're with companions):

• phone in to "home base" everyday
• be properly prepared (food, water, first aid, etc.)
• don't attempt climbing or other potentially dangerous activities
• watch ground and rocks carefully for snakes
• be prepared with proper gear and knowledge to treat a snake bite
• stay hydrated
• know the signs of heat exhaustion and don't push physical limits
• stick to trip & activity plan and make sure "home base" has trip & activity plan
• stay on planned hiking trails as per plan
• for unknown routes (like my hike to Dog Canyon)- I left a big note in my truck (visible from the outside) stating my direction and destination

IN CLOSING

So what did I find and experience other than my planned optimum photographic opportunities?

Put simply, I had a damn good time. It was fun and I enjoyed it.

I gained a sense of accomplishment. My activites may not be such a big deal to some, but most people don't attempt such endeavors. I enjoy telling people that I camped by myself for 4 nights without running water, electricity, or a solid roof overhead, and then watch their amazement as they realize what that really means. It's fun to recall the many miles and thousands of feet in elevation that I've hiked in the desert.

I gained a new level of appreciation for the land and natural resources. I spent time with the land in attempt to connect with it and photograph it as I viewed it. I wondered slowly along in most places and let my senses take in everything that was offered. The sights, sounds, and smells are firmly imprinted on my mind and those memories will last a long time.

I feel like a better and more secure person. Deep inside at my core, I feel like a strong foundation exists. I feel like I'm now standing on firmer ground and my direction in life is more sure. I don't know why this is true. I think maybe because I've been challeneged and put to a test by attempting this trip, and I've passed by coming home safely. Or perhaps it was me getting into the desert and the desert getting into me. There is something out there that fills the voids in your life and tells you that you're part of a greater world than what you've perceived.

Now, did I really get nice photos? Well, that's up to you to decide. I like them, but I have a strong personal connection to them. That certainly clouds my judgement :-)